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despite the dimness

2010 November 11
by jlares

Sometimes I wonder if it’s ever possible to not feel like you’re drowning in details and doubt when you’re so committed to something that was bound to be bigger than you and now has a life of its own. But then, in between the consuming waves are rays of sunshine. Quick bursts of light, reflecting. Sudden reminders of your own light buried by layers of sediment, by rocks of envy and insecurity. These reminders can come in the smallest detail from a message over gchat, or in new friendships, but the breadth with which it affects you is outstanding. Somehow, despite one’s dim aura, certain people still see and are attracted to what used to be there–or really, what is there, though temporarily forgotten.

Today I was surrounded by such rays.

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